Hello there, I'm Shane and I've been a friend of Kurt for many years. Please, don't look so worried, I'll be finished quite soon. It's been an honor to be Kurt's best man, and I'm sure you'll agree that my first duty, that of getting Kurt to the church, sober, on time, and eventually married, was a success. And now, it is my great honor and privilege to make a toast to Kurt and his beautiful bride Jenn as husband and wife. While some people know that Kurt and I went to college together,
it is a little known fact that we first met in a high school science program,
some eight years ago, when Kurt used to wear button shirts and long pants all
the time, and carry a big belt buckle.
Maybe he fancied himself a cowboy.
Anyway, back then, his passion was chemistry, and I remember he would
make all sorts of chemicals fizz and spark violently, while the fainthearted
would run in terror. Oh yes, I was just
Kurt and I have done a lot of growing up together since then, a lot of sharing of hopes and dreams. One of those dreams comes true today. I remember when these two met at a conference in San Diego, and just happened to sit at the same table. Just a few short weeks later, Kurt said he felt "weird" and "nervous" after talking to Jenn on the phone. He felt like a voice had said, "This is your future wife; get to know her." And only a few days after that, he declared with boyish exuberance that he'd fallen in love with Jennifer Lynn. And now, here we are. The seed of that love, planted and nurtured over the past year and a half has come to full fruition -- man and woman coming together as one, just as God intended. And so I say to all of you who are my brothers in bachelorhood, we have lost another from our esteemed ranks. Yes, Kurt has left us to carry on all the single guy traditions like being able to have sandwiches and leftovers for dinner every night, cruising all over Los Angeles looking for action, and staying up late into the wee hours of the morning, answerable to no one. Yes, bachelorhood has its privileges. And, I guess married life does as well... Jenn, in the time I've known you, you've revealed yourself to be a very godly woman. You are all Kurt wanted in a wife and more; sincere, thoughtful, kind, loving, creative and beautiful. I'm sure Kurt will never tire of singing your praises. And I don't need to remind you that the man you will share a life with is a very wonderful man. He has taught me so much. His passion, honesty, perseverance, gentleness, and love have been an example and inspiration to many. You have found a real man, a Christian man worthy of the name. Kurt and Jenn, I love you both. You are dear friends to me. I have seen you both grow as individuals and blossom as a couple, and that's brought me great joy. Today, we celebrate everything you have found in each other -- a best friend, a lover, a teacher, a true partner -- for life. 
As you walk down life's trail together, enjoy the sunshine and the flowers and the gentle breezes, and always, always hold hands. The springtime of your life has just begun. May your joy be complete, your hearts be knit together in love and mutual affection, and may your life be long and full of years -- together. So if everyone could now join me in a toast to Mr. and Mrs. Kurt and Jennifer Klein. Congratulations! 
June 23, 2001 |
beginning to know the pyromaniac that was Kurt, a.k.a. Acetone, whose notorious
name will forever be associated with spectacular displays of fireworks.
But I'm not here to talk about the honeymoon...